Moving day - again
Nicole McMullin
February 28, 2008 3:27 PM
If you know me or have read my blog it will come to no surprise that this blog has moved to a new address. It’s just me way these days. I promise that I will be as witty and confused as ever, I’ll just be doing it on this domain from now on.
We’ve also added another blogger, Becky Suder, to the mix whose a great writer and excellent mom.
If you have http://parenting.mytimesdispatch.com/ saved as a bookmark or are aggregating the RSS feed, please update to the new blog and continue commenting on my life as a new momma.
NEW URL
http://www.parenting.myinrich.com
NEW RSS
http://www.myinrich.com/index.php/parenting/newmomma-rss_2.0/
Thanks for visiting my new place!
Bathing in first foods
Nicole McMullin
February 20, 2008 8:14 PM
I’ve eaten really good chocolate cake and thought to myself, “This is so good I would like to swim in it.” But I have never thought that way of applesauce or green peas.
But bathe in applesauce and peas I have since I’ve started feeding Sophia her first foods.
I admit it’s been fun. I’ve pretty much let her explore the new foods and process of eating regardless of the mess. She grabs the spoon and pulls it to her face, getting the food all over her. She aims for her mouth, but the coordination is not there yet. Sometimes she hits her mark and seems to love the new flavors.
After our first meal with applesauce I made a mental note to always change clothes before feeding the baby her dinner. And while I could also consider a hat to keep it out of my hair and an adult bib to keep my clothes clean, there’s an amount of bonding that takes place when you’re both covered in food.
Dinner time is now followed by a bath for Sophia, though. By the time I try to wipe her down from head to toe I may as well put her in the tub.
Sophie’s active participation is limited to applesauce and green peas for the moment. I cannot seem to get her as excited about rice cereal. It seems to inspire the opposite response.
In the coming weeks we plan to try carrots, bananas and sweet potatoes, and I will still push the rice cereal although she’s already protested. I found a good guide online and plan to follow-up with my pediatrician as well.
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I have a new Valentine
Nicole McMullin
February 14, 2008 7:46 PM
After 11 years of celebrating Valentine’s Day with the same man, I am happy to report that I have a new love - my daughter.
I know it’s not a surprise and no one is shocked. All mothers love their children. But what excites me is how much my love for her grows each day.
As previously mentioned, I may not be a “baby person.” I have struggled with bonding and caretaking. I’m an only child and a bit of a loner and it’s been challenging for me to find my footing in my new role as a parent.
But things are changing for the better.
I’ve learned a lot and grown as a person in the past six months. I’ve gone from being unsure of what to do when I am at home alone with the baby to feeling like I am missing a limb when I am home alone without the baby.
And she has grown into a wonderful little girl. Her personality is blossoming and each day she develops a more unique presence. She looks like Sophia now, not just like all of the rest of the baby girls.
She is still a baby and needs complete care, but she is increasingly independent as well. She knows what she wants - whether it’s her command center or her mommy - and doesn’t just settle for what we give her, which is often the command center (which she does love, by the way).
As for my husband, I don’t think he minds sharing the holiday with someone else. She is his new Valentine as well. Our first Valentine’s Day as a couple was a disaster, but our time together as a family this evening has been romantic and sweet.
And unlike me, Sophia is a cheap date. She wasn’t hoping for roses.
Infant formula in my coffee
Nicole McMullin
February 07, 2008 10:44 AM
I poured baby formula in my coffee this morning. It was bound to happen at some point. In fact, I am surprised it took this long.
It’s a simple mistake - one weary-eyed mama stands in front of the refrigerator in her pajamas thinking only of drinking a hot cup of creamy coffee.
She reaches for the milk, but her brain fumbles and forgets that infant formula is not milk.
She pours a healthy amount of formula into her cup of coffee and pauses - something’s not right. The creamy half & half is not swimming in the dark coffee creating the ideal caramel-colored cup of Joe. No, it’s baby formula, not half & half, and it appears to have sunk to the bottom of the cup.
Still weary-eyed and just wanting to drink it up, I considered drinking the formula-filled coffee - I could use a little extra iron, DHA and ARA as well. I decided against it; I am willing to waste one cup of coffee down the drain in the hopes that the next cup will be just right.
And for the future, I may have to rethink the arrangement of items in my refrigerator.
Baby politicos
Nicole McMullin
February 04, 2008 1:49 PM
I washed Sophia’s Guns ‘n’ Roses onesie last week and wondered, “How silly is it that I am making my infant wear T-shirts promoting a band I like.”
I bought the Guns ‘n’ Roses onesie while I was pregnant, screen printed with the Appetite for Destruction album cover, and was excited for her to grow up and wear it with jeans. Inspired by celebrity baby Maddox, I thought Sophie would look kind of cute.
Of course, she may grow up to hate everything that I like and look back on the cute photos with disgust. But it’s a band and we all have different taste in music, so I’ll deal with it when the day comes.
But while I am willing to dress her up in a rock ‘n’ roll T-shirt so that she can promote a band to the other babies, I’m not ready to leap forward to political statements.
(Sure, music can be a political statement, but I’m not talking about Jello Biafra baby clothes.)
Some parents are making political statements on the playground, though, according to an article on CNN.com, “Kids turned into political billboards.”
“"Party-training," it seems, can’t start early enough. Baby onesies, bibs and T-shirts with the Democratic donkey and the Republican elephant are proliferating as the presidential race accelerates,” according to the article.
“Moms and dads who buy the merchandise say it’s harmless fun that reinforces the family’s core beliefs.”
That’s all well and good, but I’m just not ready to put my kid out to stump.
It could be argued that a T-shirt emblazed with “Pint-size Republican,” or “Demi Democrat,” is not the only way to make a political statement. My daughter’s new pink Converse All Stars (baby size 3) and Dickies jacket (also pink) probably say as much about her parents and our lifestyle as a McCain, Romney, Obama or Clinton T-shirt.
She’s advertising those brands, which in turn advertise a lifestyle. So maybe it’s more of a social, and not political, statement.
In the CNN.com article, Joan Ingber, a therapist who specializes in children’s issues at the Institute for Contemporary Psychotherapy in Manhattan, writes (in regards to political statements on children’s clothes,) “It seems cute and benign. However, the more I think about it, the more it fails to pass my cringe test. It seems that we’re bombarded enough by constant advertising, so why should children become the canvas for any ad? ... Do we really want to see kids in this role?”
Besides Axl and Slash, Sophia also has Sublime and Clash onesies. I’m not taking them back, but perhaps I should balance her wardrobe and social statements with Celine Dion and Hootie and the Blowfish. I need a few more years to digest Mylie Cyrus or Hannah Montana - or whatever the kids call her these days.
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Will my child be privileged?
Nicole McMullin
February 03, 2008 12:40 AM
While reading a friend’s online journal Saturday morning I came across the Privilege Meme.
The Privilege Meme, and the Take a Step Forward exercise, was developed at Indiana State University to explore class and targeted at college students in the United States and recent college graduates, explains Will Barratt, a professor at Indiana State University and one of the developers of the meme, on the college’s Web site.
“We designed a small group experience on privilege as a way to explore class, creating a list of items grounded in the published research literature and in our interviews as markers of privilege. Our assumption was that that privilege is one way to explore class,” he explains on Indiana State University’s Web site.
For the in-class exercise, students stand in a line and respond to a series of questions (posted below). Students take a step forward each time they answer yes. In the end, students are standing in different places in the room illustrating levels of privilege.
I find this interesting and somewhat scary. Should I add memes such as this to my personal (internal) parenting guide?
I can answer “yes” to 22 of 34 questions. So if I want my daughter to achieve more than I, should I make sure she can answer yes all 34 – at least?
These things go around the Internet all of the time. This one is a little different because it was developed in an academic setting, not just by someone writing questions for a favorite drink quiz (although I answer those, too). And while one classroom exercise or meme does not a parenting/lifestyle/career guide make, I agree with my friend, on whose journal I found the Privilege Meme; these questions are quite good.
My friend posted her responses in her online journal and received some interesting comments. One thread was particularly engaging as she and another friend discussed the idea that answering these questions in a classroom setting could be embarrassing for someone who doesn’t have as many opportunities to step forward.
Their discussion centered around the difference in life experience and opportunity, in this case measured as things someone is privileged to have instead of things they earned. The discussion thread just stopped – kind of like they agreed to disagree – so I wonder if this came up the next time they met in person.
As a parent, I want it all for my child. I want to open as many doors for her as possible while instilling in her the drive and ability to open them on her own. The Privilege Meme tells me that enriching myself is as important as encouraging my child. And activities together, from simply reading to planning a trip, are important. Maybe not a guide, but interesting insight into what personal and family experiences are considered to be privileged.
For instance – notice that there are two questions about number of books in a home, and not the number of televisions (there is one question about the location of a television). Seems like the meme is hinting that access to (cheap) books ranks higher on a scale of privilege than access to (expensive) big HD TVs. (To be clear, there is an updated version on the school’s Web site that would apply to students today that includes a question about computers in the home as well).
My answers are below. The questions I answered “yes” to are bold. Post your answers as well and let’s discuss.
This meme was developed by Minnette Huck, Meagan Cahill, Stacy Ploskonka, Drew Lurker, Angie Carlen and Will Barratt. The developers hold the copyright and ask participants in this blog game to acknowledge their copyright.
1. Father went to college.
2. Father finished college.
3. Mother went to college.
4. Mother finished college.
5. Have any relative who is an attorney, physician, or professor.
6. Were the same or higher class than your high school teachers.
7. Had more than 50 books in your childhood home.
8. Had more than 500 books in your childhood home.
9. Were read children’s books by a parent.
10. Had lessons of any kind before you turned 18.
11. Had more than two kinds of lessons before you turned 18.
12. The people in the media who dress and talk like me are portrayed positively.
13. Had a credit card with your name on it before you turned 18.
14. Your parents (or a trust) paid for the majority of your college costs.
15. Your parents (or a trust) paid for all of your college costs.
16. Went to a private high school.
17. Went to summer camp.
18. Had a private tutor before you turned 18.
19. Family vacations involved staying at hotels.
20. Your clothing was all bought new before you turned 18.
21. Your parents bought you a car that was not a hand-me-down from them.
22. There was original art in your house when you were a child.
23. You and your family lived in a single-family house.
24. Your parent(s) owned their own house or apartment before you left home.
25. You had your own room as a child.
26. You had a phone in your room before you turned 18.
27. Participated in a SAT/ACT prep course.
28. Had your own TV in your room in high school.
29. Owned a mutual fund or IRA in high school or college.
30. Flew anywhere on a commercial airline before you turned 16.
31. Went on a cruise with your family.
32. Went on more than one cruise with your family.
33. Your parents took you to museums and art galleries as you grew up.
34. You were unaware of how much heating bills were for your family.
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