My husband and I became certified parents last week.
The certificate, handed to us at the end of our last parenting class held at the hospital where we plan to deliver our fist child, verifies that we have “completed a course of instruction.”
That’s it. So we’re still freaked out.
And as my September 7 due date approaches, I am trying to mentally close the book on my pregnancy and prepare for my new role as mother to a baby girl.
Our goal in taking the class was to learn more about what to expect at the hospital during delivery and pick up a few basics we can use at home in the days that follow.
During the class, we watched videos confirming that the miracle of birth resembles a science fiction film and were told which door to use should I go into labor at 3 a.m.
The class was helpful and I am more confident about laboring and giving birth, but I still have a lot to learn about the days that follow.
It’s a joke that’s made too often, but seriously, they’re just going to give me the baby and send me home?
My mother lived less than a mile from her sister, mother and grandmother when she was a new parent. There were plenty of helping hands, wisdom and opinions (for better or for worse). I left home more than a decade ago and am relying on books, podcasts and the experiences of co-workers and strangers to get me through.
And I keep hearing about mother’s intuition. I’m hoping that kicks in and I can rely on it, too.
But I am running out of time to ponder the large issues of motherhood and need to get down the basics. At 36 weeks and counting, it’s time to wrap up my pregnancy and move forward into motherhood - ready or not.
At some moments I think that our baby girl cannot arrive fast enough. Pregnancy was cute for a few months, but it’s been hot and humid this summer and my feet have resembled swollen potatoes since June. I long to walk without waddling. I am tired of sandals that make noise.
Plus, my friends and family showered us with adorable gifts that I can’t wait to use.
But I feel as much joy as fear when I think about the days, and years, that lie ahead. I have a lot to learn. Mistakes will be made - and I foresee a future full of never completed to-do lists.
Almost a mommy to-do list
Find a lactation consultant who will come to the hospital and my house.
Write a birthing plan. Make copies. Attempt to organize and micromanage the birthing process.
Pack a bag for the hospital.
Install car seat.
Move and set up the nursery (see below).
Sell my condo.
Check in with my health insurance provider; verify that all is well with my coverage and begin panicking about the bills.
Create a will.
Find local new parent groups to meet up with while I am on maternity leave, and hopefully on the weekends and evenings once I return to work.
Pick songs for baby’s first playlist.
Still deciding
Am I going to hire a doula?
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Posted by Nicole McMullin in
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Parenting
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New Momma
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Carlie,
It’s good to hear from you! Thanks for the note about the birthing plan. I’m going to work on it this week. I checked out a couple of Web sites with sample plans. If I can’t find one that has everything I want, I may combine a few and get all the notes I can possibly think of in the plan. You’re right, it’s probably best to have one if I end up needing a cesarean, at which point I will be too exhausted and freaked out to communicate well with others.
I’m not sure about the baby making her first appearance this week. She has been busy lately – kind of like she’s looking for the way out – but I could use a few more weeks to get everything ready.
And we’re still keeping the name under wraps. We think we know, but want to meet baby girl before we decide for sure.
Nicole McMullin of Richmond, VA
Aug. 18, 2007 at 11:33 PM
OK, so what’s her name?
Carlie Dillon of Princeton, WV
Aug. 16, 2007 at 08:58 PM
Hi Nicole,
Well, about the birthing plan, I wrote one, a fill in the blank form from the internt and took it to the hospital when I went to have Reno. Needless to say, at that time no one at the hospital had ever seen one and the reactions were almost insulting. Well as things work out, I figured I would have to have a c-section and did at which point the written plan came in handy because I was too exhausted to give anybody and orders and I did not want to be put to sleep. So make sure you get your plan written soon.
Use Max and your mom for your doula--they will need to give each other breaks and belive me you will mean to both of them, but they won’t give up on you.
So, anyway I’m still betting on the baby coming sometime this week.
Take care,
Carlie
Carlie Dillon of Princeton, WV
Aug. 16, 2007 at 08:15 PM
Thanks for the comments! And a good question - what is a birthing plan?
A written birthing plan communicates the personal experience a family wants to have during labor and delivery to the hospital staff.
From the research I’ve done, which is ongoing, it should outline which procedures, medications, tests, etc. I want for myself and my child during labor and delivery and the hours and days that follow.
A birthing plan can also include personal requests, such as “dim the lights during labor” or “don’t bring me soup,” as well as a list of family members that can be allowed in the delivery room, and which ones need to wait patiently in the waiting room.
From what I understand, nurses and hospitals appreciate the written plan. It’s an easy reference during what can be a long and stressful process.
But more to come…
Nicole McMullin of Richmond, VA
Aug. 16, 2007 at 10:06 AM
Aunty Matty is most confident you will make excellent parents!
Matty Koval of Richmond, VA
Aug. 16, 2007 at 09:38 AM
Now you’ve really scared me and I am not even pregnant. What’s a birthing plan?
Linda Moccio-Webb of Richmond, VA
Aug. 16, 2007 at 07:51 AM
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